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Alright, so, you wanna know about that there Staff of the Moonmaiden, huh? It’s a thing in some game, Baldur’s Gate 3 they call it. My grandkids, they play it all the time, makin’ all sorts of noise. Anyways, I hear ’em talkin’ about it, so I picked up a thing or two.

Now, this staff, it ain’t just any ol’ stick you find in the woods. It’s a magic stick, see? Does somethin’ or other, I reckon. They say it’s a ritual staff, which sounds fancy, but I bet it’s just for whacking things. Kids these days, they love whacking things in their games.

Where d’you find it, you ask? Well, it ain’t easy, that’s for sure. Seems like you gotta go to some dark place, the Underdark they call it. Sounds spooky, if you ask me. Full of creepy crawlies, I bet. My grandkid, little Timmy, he says there’s three parts to this staff, scattered all over the place.

• One piece, they say, is with some crazy elf. Lives near a “sussar tree,” whatever that is. Sounds like somethin’ out of a fairy tale, if you ask me. Elves, always up to no good, I tell ya.
• Another piece, it’s on a dead body. In some vault, “Spaw’s Vault.” Sounds like a tomb, doesn’t it? I ain’t goin’ in no tomb, no sir. Too many ghosts and spiders.
• The last piece? Well, that’s the tricky part, ain’t it? They never told me where the last piece is. Maybe you gotta figure it out yourself. Kids these days, they like puzzles. Me, I prefer a good ol’ crossword.

So, you get all these pieces, and then what? You put ’em together, I guess. Like a puzzle, see? And then you got this magic staff. Does it shoot fireballs? Does it turn people into frogs? I dunno. Maybe it just whacks things better. Like I said, kids love whacking things.

My grandkid, Sarah, she’s always readin’ things in that game. Little notes and books and such. She says there’s somethin’ about the staff in the game, some clues maybe. Text lying around, she calls it. Says you gotta pay attention, or you’ll miss it. Kids these days, they’re too smart for their own good.

Then there’s somethin’ about a moonstone. Sounds pretty, doesn’t it? Like somethin’ you’d wear on a necklace. But in this game, it’s somethin’ you gotta shoot at. With the staff, I guess. Or maybe with somethin’ else. I dunno. These games, they’re too complicated for an old woman like me.

Anyways, once you shoot this moonstone, somethin’ happens. It gets disabled, they say. Like turnin’ off a light switch, I reckon. And then what? Well, I dunno. Maybe the staff gets more powerful. Or maybe a door opens. Or maybe a dragon shows up. Who knows? These game makers, they’re always comin’ up with crazy things.

So, that’s about all I know about this Staff of the Moonmaiden. It’s a magic stick, you find it in pieces, you whack things with it, and you shoot moonstones. Sounds like a lot of trouble, if you ask me. But these kids, they love it. Guess it keeps ’em outta trouble, at least most of the time. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I gotta go make some supper. All this talk about magic sticks and moonstones has made me hungry.

Weight about 3.6 pounds, they say. Heavy enough to knock some sense into those young’uns, I reckon. And it does 1d6 bludgeoning. Whatever that means. Probably means it hurts when you get whacked with it. Seems like a good stick to have around, just in case.

They also say this staff might not be as important as you think. Some people, they thought it was a big deal, but then they never found a use for it. So, maybe it’s not worth all the trouble. But then again, maybe it is. You never know with these games. Always hidin’ secrets and such. Like findin’ a twenty dollar bill in your old coat pocket, surprise!

And there’s more talk about its description and history. But honestly, who cares about all that? I just wanna know if it can help me get rid of those pesky squirrels in my garden. Maybe I should ask Timmy to lend me that staff for a while. Show those squirrels who’s boss.

Tags: Baldur’s Gate 3, Staff of the Moonmaiden, Ritual Staff, Underdark, Sussar Tree, Spaw’s Vault, Moonstone, Magic Item, Game Guide, BG3